Tots Thoughts: Condoms are Icky

If I had to list the things I hate most in this world, condoms would round out my top ten right behind ISIS.  Studies show that people who prefer condom sex have a 73% chance of getting bit by a shark while scuba diving.  Crazy right?  They leave that nasty film on your member and you end up itching your junk the rest of the night.  Buying them is a big time hassle.  The dusty old fart behind the counter always makes a snarky comment.  “Big plans tonight?”  You’re god damn right I have big times tonight Earl.  Mind your business.  Nothing will change my mind.  Condoms are and forever will be icky.

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